July 19, 2001
Insight Inventory (Major Ones from This Trip So Far)
(1) I have charisma. I know this is kind of a conceited proclamation and anyone reading this journal in the future will have to excuse me but this is a journey of self discovery. People seem to like me and want to talk to me. Not people caught up in images. I have to stop worrying about being rejected by plastic people (and make sure never to become a plastic person myself). I hope I never develop into someone who can’t see souls. I don’t want to be a tribal person who clusters together with others so I can exclude and make fun of others. This insight is important to me. I was very shy growing up and after my divorce lost any confidence I did have. I would go out into the world, talk to people and then go home and critique myself. I would always berate myself for the stupid things I said and my social awkwardness. I am not going to do that anymore.
(2) The greatest social movements of our time were nonviolent acts by people possessing great faith, Gandhi, Martin Luther King, and Pope John Paul. Faith is an energizer that propels people to accomplish extraordinary things.
(3) What do we do about the poor? Is it right for me to have material things when others don’t? Is it hypocritical to say I care when I’m really not willing to share all that I have? Maybe giving back doesn’t have to be about things. Maybe I can give back in other ways, listening, sharing wisdom, writing, just smiling and saying “hello”. Or I can simply ask people how they are and if they have a problem, ask how can I help.