Labor Day Weekend 2001
Strange to be home. The rooms are spread out with many steps between things but I will get used to it again.
I called my son and daughter, relatives, and friends. Unpacked, did some laundry, picked up my mail and went through it. Then I went off to school to set up my classroom. I had a lot to do but I took a deep breath and tired not to get discouraged. This was part of the the plan, to really concentrate my effort in a short amount of time. It was a small price to pay for having an almost infinite vacation.
My journey had become a personal odyssey, a search for answers, a time to be alone and think. I sat down with my journal, eighty pages of pouring out my heart under the stars and unraveling mistakes and regrets in the shadows of beautiful mountains. I flipped through the pages, reading what I had written and realized what whiner I am. My thoughts had been filled with so many worries and complaints. It was at this moment, staring down at my pen and pencil scribbles, that I learned the lesson I had traveled so far to discover. It was a subtle truth but a very powerful one. It is simply to enjoy each day, each moment and not worry about all the bad things that may or may not happen. Through my whole trip I worried that my van might break down, that something was wrong with the tires, or I had ruined the brakes when I had gone down the steep mountain. It was foolish because nothing happened. My vacation would have been much more enjoyable if I hadn’t brought my anxiety with me.
I found out that I will be an inclusion teacher this year, something I have never done before. I’m also the new president of my local Toastmasters’ International. Again, something I have never done before. I’m not going to worry about any of it!
It was a good trip. Inspiring. And it’s hard not to worry about the little things that might go wrong. Planning ahead for problems when there is nothing to be done until it happens.
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As Nike says “just do it!” I think we both have that spirit of adventure. I’d rather take the risk instead having the regret that I didn’t get out there. Somehow we will make it through.
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